| image courtesy of davidniblack.com |
If we are going to be about Jesus, how do we do it? If you've been in church very long, you know the answers to most of the questions. You wave your hands when the teacher asks the questions (literally or in your head), because the answer is almost always one of two things right? 1. Jesus (that's always a good answer - seriously, it is) and 2. Pray and read my Bible. We say or hear it so often, it starts to lose meaning. Not because there isn't power in prayer and Bible study, but because we start to glaze over it. When you've been in church a long time like me, it's so very easy to know the answers without actually doing any of it. Or is it just me?
If we are going to be about Him, we've got to know Him. I don't mean know about Him. You can know the entire Bible and never know Him if your motives are in the wrong place. Again, I'm speaking from experience. God's really been breaking me over this very thing and I have more to say about spending time in His Word, but that's not what this post is about.
I feel the need to share about prayer and what God's showing me. What is prayer? Again, we church-goers know the pat answer: talking to God. Is it really that simple? Have we made it something harder? Is there more to it? I think there is one person in the Bible who can teach us so much about prayer. You think I'm going to say Jesus, right? That would be a seriously good answer, but not this time. I'm talking about David. The guy who is called "a man after God's own heart." Take a walk through the Psalms of David and we get a portrait of David pouring his heart out to God. Have you ever read one of David's Psalms and thought "hey, he can't talk to God that way!" Yet, he did and not only that, his cry made it into our Bible for God's people to continue to read and learn from for thousands of years. I think it's because God wanted us to see that He desires us to talk to Him. To get real with Him. To lay bare before Him. To praise Him. To acknowledge His ways. To pour our complaints out to Him. To just be us and let Him be Him.
Psalms shows us that we can talk to God about anything and everything. The intimacy between God and David leaps off our pages. It's not because David was better or more loved, but because David was real and he never stops talking to his Father. Some of the Psalms are full of praise and awe of our Creator. Some are words of gratitude penned by an humble servant. Others are full of anger and confusion wondering where is God. Those are the ones where David almost seems disrespectful. And maybe he is at times, but obviously God can handle it.
I struggle with prayer. These days it doesn't come natural to me. It hasn't always been this way. There was a time in my life where I talked to God continuously and easily. He was truly my Friend and my Savior. What happened? God hasn't changed, so why did I? First of all, this time of intimacy was when I was 19. I was single. I had no kids. I was blessed with a job where I could literally read my Bible for hours while only stopping to answer the phone every once in awhile. I told God about everything: my dreams, my struggles, my complaints, my love for Him, all of it. To be honest, it was easy. The sad part is that it stopped the second it got hard. I switched jobs to a fast-paced, no break environment. I was in college. I got married. I got too busy for my relationship with God. My desire has always been about Him and His will for me, but busyness and distraction took over and I justified that it was a season of my life. Then, I had kids. Oh, those cute, little blessings and distractions I've been given. Another season. Another excuse. (Moms of little ones, please hear me, there is grace and lots of it. Don't be burdened. Learn from me though and give Him what you can. He is worth it even if it's only a few minutes here and there. You are worth it.)
Then, I woke up one day and realized that I rarely prayed. I wasn't even really comfortable doing so anymore. Me, the fixer and planner, went out and bought way too many books about prayer and dove in. I was going to be "good" at this prayer thing. I was going to figure it out. As I started down this path, I started worrying more about doing it right than just talking with my Father. I'm so grateful for the disciple who asked Jesus how should we pray. Jesus answers with what we call the Lord's Prayer, or sometimes the Model Prayer. We can learn so much from it, but what happens when you become so wrapped up in following that awesome model? For me, two things happened,
1. My prayer life was still hit-and-miss at best. If I couldn't do it "right", I wasn't doing it all.
and,
2. It became a facade. I became more concerned with what words I was saying than with sharing my heart.
God wants your heart. He doesn't care about you using the right words. Jesus warned about repetitious words. They become empty and prideful. Do not get me wrong here. We should come to God with reverence and ideally that means coming to Him out of a place of praise. We should be concerned about our attitude and mindset when coming to Him. Our prayers should not be filled with selfishness of "I need this" and "I want that." I'm not downplaying His holiness. He is holy. We are not.
But stop worrying about doing it right and just talk to Him. The more you do, the more your attitude will align with His. The more natural it will become. I'm living proof. Praying is becoming easier again. Not because I have more time. I don't. Not because I've figured it out. I haven't. Because I'm talking to Him again, my Friend, my Redeemer.
Let's learn from David. If you have no idea where to start, open up your Bible and read Psalms (they are right in the middle if you don't know where to find them). Cry out to your Father. Lay bare before Him. Give Him everything you have. He's big enough for all your words, no matter if they are out of confusion or anger or praise. He wants all of you! Remember, He calls you friend.
Talk to Him.
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